Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!
Mom just called me...my leash is
on...outdoor time! I could just howl with happiness. She has that
strange frilly thing on, it must be race time! Puppy run? But she is
no puppy, I'm the puppy. But she is doing the oddest thing right now.
She is lapping from the showerhead like a puppy. Perhaps this is some
strange ritual where masters act like dogs...
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. The door is
opening! My human is so slow! I want to race down the stairs, but she
is not her usual chipper self! Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! We are
running. Well, what she calls running. I call it fast walking.
How I love to smell the grass. Oh boy,
oh boy, oh boy! Hmm...the dog next door peed here. I see he had
Fromm's for breakfast. I should leave him a message for his next
visit. Master is jogging alongside me. She smells funny, like sweat,
blood and fear. I see a bunch of new dots on her arms and legs. It
must be those pesky flying bugs. That must be the fear...she hates
those things. So do I. They sometimes land on me and I snap at them.
I must try again to approach the cat about a plan of attack. He is
good at surprise attacks. He sometimes jumps out at me, and mom does
not do anything. I look at her, and she looks back at me. She does
not understand...there is no defeating that stealth mode pest.
What? What is that? I see...more dogs!
OH BOY, OH BOY, OH BOY! But...mom will not let us stop. Wuff! She has
not respect for me. Just run, run, run...squirrel! Oh boy, oh boy, oh
boy! Hmm...my master normally goes all the way up the hill under this
big structure...she calls it a ….bark...bardge...bridge. A bridge.
Now we have turned around. OH BOY! It's
that dog! She let's us stop for about a minute this time. He has a
ball. I LOVE BALLS! We are running again...drat. We stop again at a
house. There are small humans. They are spraying water at us. I hate
water. I hate getting wet, but for some reason my master loves it.
She can be so weird.
Run run run, right past that building
with the human I hate. He is big and I don't like the look of him
(the military statue near the American Legion post), I tried barking
at him one time but he was not fazed by my intimidating war cry.
 |
| The author, Artemis, and his master, Rachel. |
Ooh, a rock. I want to pee...but master
pulls at my leash. Run, she says, we are almost there. Almost where?
We finally arrive back home. She is acting weird. I bet if I nudged
her, she would fall over.
OH BOY, OH BOY, OH BOY! SOOOPHIE! I
LOVE YOU!
Sophie's master came outside. I love
playing with Sophie. We run and run and run. Sometimes she tries to
herd me...then I wrestle with her. Sophie's master is doing something
funny with my mom's voice box, at least she talks into it a lot. And
it makes funny beeping noises. Master is being silly and standing on
one foot.
She is trying to get me to look at the
voice box. I do not like looking at it...oh all right. Just for a few
seconds. Silly master.
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, dinner! Yummy!
